June 27, 2008
NY Yankees slugger Jason Giambi has a new look but I can’t decide whether he looks more like Wade Boggs or Ron Jeremy.
Either way, it’s a much better look than Giambi’s fellow teammate Johnny Damon used to rock.
Oh wait, that’s not Johnny Damon.
My mistake.
Thx to Deadspin
June 26, 2008
Little did I know twenty years ago when I first illicitly saw Predator that it was not just a classic action movie starring both the Terminator and Apollo Creed fighting an alien, but that it was also a veritable breeding-ground of future politicians.
Well, consider this. Not only have two of the cast gone on to be elected governor, now a third is considering a run for the Senate from Kentucky. Billy the tracker from Predator (Sonny Landham in real life) is gathering signatures so that he can challenge current Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell as an independant.
If he’s even half as tough in real life as he was in Predator, he’d have my vote.
Thx to Shenanigans
June 17, 2008
How bad does one’s political blunder have to be to not only force the end of a previously promising gubernatorial bid, but to impact a presidential race almost two decades later? Very, very bad indeed.
Many here in Texas have distant and dusty memories of the West Texas oilcatter and Aggie, Clayton Williams, who ran unsuccessfully for governor against Ann Richards in 1990. His campaign was going fairly well until he started lobbing rape and drinking “jokes” against his opponent who had publicly acknowledged struggles with alcohol.
Perhaps almost as unforgivable as his tasteless broadsides against Governor Richards, Claytie also made headlines when he refused to shake her hand before a debate in Dallas.
Well, John McCain’s army of vetting wizards apparently failed to uncover these obscure political nuggets in Claytie’s past when they scheduled a fundraiser for Senator McCain at Claytie’s house in Midland. Senator Obama’s team was quick to point out Claytie’s unsavory past, and McCain rescheduled the fundraiser, but decided to keep the $300,000 or so already raised with Claytie’s assistance.
Thx to the Politico’s Jonathan Martin and Texas on the Potomac
June 10, 2008
Yesterday, former Justice Thomas clerk and hopefully-not-former syndicated radio host Laura Ingraham posted the following message on her website giving some insight into why she has been suddenly absent from the airwaves for the past week and a half:
NOTE TO LAURA LISTENERS
Due to contractual obligations, for the present time I am unable to reveal why I am not currently hosting The Laura Ingraham Show. Rest assured, this absence is not of my choosing, nor is it health or family related. I am ready, willing and eager to continue the conversation we started seven years ago about politics and the culture. (Heck, if cancer couldn’t keep me off the airwaves for long, nothing will.) Keep checking the site for a schedule of my appearances on the Fox News Channel. All queries regarding my on-air status should be directed to Talk Radio Network’s management at 541 474 2297 or send an email. Thanks for sticking with me, and…Power to the People!
Just breaking this afternoon, Laura will make her second foray into hosting her own cable news show. She was one of MSNBC’s first hosts, headlining Watch It! which came on right after Imus. Beginning next week, she’ll host Just In during the 4pmCT timeslot on Fox.
Best of luck to her both with her new show and with her old one as well.
Thx to TV Newser
June 5, 2008
We here at the SMSB are huge fans of former Justice Thomas clerk and current syndicated radio host, Laura Ingraham. So we are intrigued to read today that she might be leaving her hugely popular radio show, right at the height of its popularity.
Her absence from the airwaves this week coupled with her appearances on several Fox News shows makes it more likely her departure is related to a contractual dispute than a health concern. Plus, this eyebrow-raising email was sent by one of her producers over the weekend to a guest scheduled to be on the air Monday:
From: Tom Elliott
To: Donny Pauling, Craig Gross
Date: Sun, Jun 1, 2008 at 3:48 PM
Subject: TomorrowHey, guys –
Bad news. We’re going to have to take a rain check on tomorrow’s segment. I’m unable to provide a lot of detail, but the short story is that Laura will not be hosting the Laura Ingraham show for the foreseeable future. This just developed over the weekend, so I apologize for the late notice. Could someone please contact Ron, or should I? Whatever’s easiest. (I don’t have an email address, and don’t really want to bother him on a Sunday.)
I do hope we’ll still be able to air this segment; it likely will just have to wait a little while.
Thanks,
Tom
Tom Elliott
Executive Producer
The Laura Ingraham Show
Thx to Radio Equalizer
June 4, 2008
Yet another reason why it’s good to be alive in Austin, Texas.
I had just finished up with a project yesterday when I came across this post from the Austinist, touting the green chili pork taco from Torchy’s Tacos, pictured above. Well, I headed straight over to Torchy’s location off of Bouldin Creek on South First (which, by the way, is a gorgeous site situated underneath big swaying live oak trees just above the babbling Bouldin Creek).
I can vouch that the green chili pork taco tastes every bit as good as its picture looks. I also sampled the fried avacado taco, which was excellent as well. Can’t wait to go back to try the [R]epublican (of course), the Democrat, the Brushfire, and—horrible though the connotations its name engenders are–the Dirty Sanchez.
* * * UPDATE * * *
Today, I sampled both the [R]epublican (which is, of course, full of pork), and the Democrat. Much to my chagrin, I have to say the Democrat kicks the [R]epublican’s tail. The barbacoa is fantastic. And I just can’t bring myself to order the Dirty Sanchez: the imagery of its namesake is just too unappetizing.
Thx to the Austinist and Torchy’s Tacos
June 4, 2008
One hundred and seventy-two years ago today, San Antonio officially became part of Texas when Alamo courier and future San Antonio mayor, Juan Seguín, accepted the Mexican surrender of San Antonio to the newly-independent Republic of Texas.
Thx to Texas on the Potomac
June 2, 2008
Sixty-seven years ago today, Sam Houston’s only surviving son–Andrew Jackson Houston–was sworn in to the U.S. Senate at the ripe old age of 87 to fill the vacancy left by the death of U.S. Senator Morris Sheppard.
Andrew’s father was sworn in as one of Texas’s first two senators almost one hundred years earlier.
Incidentally, General Houston’s colleague in the Senate was none other than the Republic’s first Chief Justice to actually preside over a session of the Texas Supreme Court: Thomas Jefferson Rusk. While Chief Rusk was, technically, Texas’s third Chief Justice, the first two Chiefs never actually convened a Court session during their eventful tenures (Texas’s first Chief Justice, James Collinsworth, committed suicide by jumping from a ship in Galveston Bay while on the ballot as a Republic presidential candidate). See James W. Paulsen, A Short History of the Supreme Court of the Republic of Texas, 65 TEX. L. REV. 237, 248-53 (1986).
While the father served in the Senate for some thirteen years from February 21, 1846, until March 4, 1859; the son’e tenure was fated to be much shorter, lasting only twenty-four days until he died on June 26, 1941.
Thx to Texas on the Potomac
June 2, 2008
You hear Keith Olbermann go off on one of his unhinged tirades, keep in mind that the insanely-mustachioed man pictured above is the man you’re listening to.
Have to admit though, he and Dan Patrick were probably the best sportscasting team ever to hit the airwaves.
Thx to Deadspin and Flash Sports Tonight
June 2, 2008
I just came across a website that shares my sense of appreciation for at least one castmember of the distaff-tastic HBO show, Sex and the City. Putting taste and decency aside, I couldn’t resist bringing you some of its content.
From www.sarahjessicaparkerlookslikeahorse.com:
Thx to Jossip
May 29, 2008
It is rare that any happening in Lubbock makes the headlines over at How Appealing, but alas, Lubbock recently found itself featured therein thanks to something that could only happen in West Texas.
The Lubbock Avanlanche-Journal reported that a wild turkey (the real thing, not the libation) unsuccessfully attempted to enter the courthouse through an upper-floor window.
If there was any doubt as to the identity of the culprit, one had to look no further than the outline in the broken window pane for the authorities to make a positive identification. That, and the stunned turkey lurking in the bushes below.
Thx to How Appealing and the Lubbock Avalanche-Journal
May 19, 2008
The National Portrait Gallery is our nation’s repository for its most famous portraits of its most revered citizens … and Stephen Colbert.
As the Capitol Crowd recounts, Colbert’s portrait arrived at its place of honor after:
Colbert trie[d] to convince the Smithsonian that he should be considered a national treasure. He attempt[ed] to donate his portrait to the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History, but the museum’s director suggest[ed] that perhaps Colbert should speak to the National Portrait Gallery.
By the way, the hallowed location at which Colbert’s portrait sits is between the public restrooms. However, his painted likeness has apparently doubled visitation at the National Portrait Gallery.
The only thing that could have possibly made his portrait even better is if he was painted while wearing his American armor, courtesy of an Austin artisan.
Thx to Capitol Crowd
May 9, 2008
Because it’s Friday afternoon, I am compelled to bring this “life imitating art” clip to you. Have to give it to Sir Charles, he was a good sport about it.
* * * WARNING: NSFW LANGUAGE * * *
And the art ….
May 8, 2008
Our own little brand of movie magic first started here in Austin in 1997 is all grown up.
A new franchisee is opening the first location outside of Texas in Winchester, Virginia, which is a college town about seventy-five miles from Washington D.C.
Alamo currently has seven locations in Texas, and plans to open two more theatres in San Antonio and McAllen, and up to thirty more locations in Florida, Georgia, Oklahoma and Arizona by 2010.
Thx to the Austin Business Journal
May 1, 2008
How much money does it take to start a record label? A lot I’m sure. But $360 billion?
That was the excuse given by a Fort Worth man who tried to cash a check made out for $360,000,000,000.00. He quickly lowered his monetary sights (by about 96 million times), however, posting bail for $3,750.00.
Thx to Above the Law, the FW Star-Telegram, and MSNBC
May 1, 2008
Craig Ferguson turned out to be a hit at this year’s White House Correspondents’ Association dinner, poking fun at everyone, but tastefully so.
President Bush’s speech was a retrospective of his past seven appearances at the dinner, some of which were pretty funny. My favorites were Laura Bush’s 2005 quip that “9:00 o’clock and Mr. Excitement here is sound asleep … and I’m watching Desperate Housewives,” and Bush’s 2001 assurance that he held no hard feelings against his brother, the then-Governor of Florida, for the Florida recount (see below).
Ferguson had some particularly good zings against the New York Times, who was very publicly absent from the soiree:
* * *
Shut the hell up NY Times you sanctimonius whining jerks!
Overheard at the party was Bunny Ranch owner Dennis Hof on Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid “I know Harry very well. He’s a good guy.” I’m sure the Senator heartily appreciated that vote of confidence.
* * * UPDATE * * *
After eating at White Castle and escaping from Guantanamo Bay, Kumar apparently attended the WHCA dinner as well.
Thx to Shenanigans, Fishbowl DC, and TV Newser
April 30, 2008
So says a male plaintiff in a lawsuit filed by three inhabitants of the Greek Island of Lesbos against the only officially-registered homosexual group in Greece to use the word “lesbian” in its name.
One of the ways the only male plaintiff stated he has been damaged is that:
My sister can’t say she is a Lesbian … [o]ur geographical designation has been usurped by certain ladies who have no connection whatsoever with Lesbos.
Proving yet again why he is the master, Professor Volokh predicted (and maybe influenced) just such a suit last summer:
Thx to Volokh, the AP, and AbovetheLaw
April 30, 2008
Above the Law has a great post about “pop-culture historian” Bill Geerhart, who at various times over the years has posed as a 10 year-old boy named “Billy” and written to various celebrities.
Upon writing to Justice Thomas and asking him what his favorite McDonald’s menu item was, Justice Thomas sent the following handwritten message back:
Even more amusing was the response “Billy” got from Hustler founder Larry Flynt, after asking Flynt if there was a “Hustler for kids” to which the youngster could subscribe:
Thx to AbovetheLaw and Radar
April 30, 2008
The AP had a great article yesterday about perhaps the most reclusive Justice on SCOTUS, Justice Souter.
In it, Justice Souter recounts how a field trip he took to Gettysburg with his law clerks affected his consternation about having to decide a certain, unnamed case.
It seems a fair assessment that one of the pivots of American history was at that place, at that moment …. I could not ever again, under any circumstance, say it is unfair that I have to do this.
Justice Souter also related a story of Judge Learned Hand, who once hurled a paperweight in anger at his law clerk, but “[f]ortunately, he was a poor pitcher.”
Remarking on an unnaturally svelte portrait on display at the Supreme Court of the only person to serve as both Chief Justice and President of the United States–the famously large William Howard Taft–Souter called it “the greatest example of aesthetic weight loss in the history of American portraiture.”
Thx to the AP and How Appealing
April 29, 2008
The New York Post has a new flash game that allows you to duke out the eventual Democrat Party nominee.
It is interesting to note that I’ve played as both candidates, and it seems that Hillary is far more accurate in landing her punches than Obama is in landing his.
Thx to the NY Post
April 25, 2008
When you’re making your entertainment plans this summer, be sure to include one last visit to the Backyard, because this summer will be your last chance to see a show at the original location.
I was just out with an old friend the other night at Doc’s MotorWorks drinking a few too many pitchers of Shiner, when we began to reminisce about the good old days of the Backyard, before it was surrounded by a parking lot and bigbox chain stores. The last show I saw there was Willie, and it was really magical to sit out under the oaks in the majestic Texas Hill Country and listen to really good Texas music.
The owner of the Backyard hopes to relocate down the road in the City of Bee Cave in a location that won’t again be overrun by developers.
So, hopefully unlike Shady Grove RV Park and the banks of Waller Creek, the Backyard will once again be a tranquil spot where you can come listen to some of the best music around.
Thx to the Austinist
April 25, 2008
My wife and I have long been fans of the Alamo Drafthouse for its great food, fantastic beer selection, and Austin ethic, but now we have even more reason to love the Alamo thanks to the TABC.
The downtown Alamo can now serve liquor!!!! Whooohooo!!!!
Now, I can actually watch Goldfinger while sipping on my very own shaken vodka martini. It just doesn’t get any better than that.
Thx to the TABC and the Alamo Drafthouse
April 23, 2008
April 23, 2008
Gilbert King has an op-ed in today’s NY Times that bemoans the SCOTUS plurality holding in Baze v. Rees, No. 07-5439, slip op. (Apr. 16, 2008 ), which upheld the constitutionality of the death penalty.
King lists three examples of botched executions, two of which were the basis of SCOTUS decisions cited by both Chief Roberts and Justice Thomas in their separate opinions. See Wilkerson v. Utah, 99 U.S. 130 (1878 ); Louisiana ex rel. Francis v. Resweber, 329 U.S. 459 (1947).
The circumstances of these three executions, while undeniably unintended and no doubt more painful and stressful to the prisoners than originally contemplated, cannot be viewed in isolation as examples of “cruel and unusual” punishment.
Let’s take a look at the manner in which these three hoodlums killed their victims that led them to death row in the first place, shall we?
First up is Wallace Wilkerson, who moved slightly just before the firing squad unleashed its volley in 1879, resulting in four fatal–if not immediately so–wounds. “My God!” Wilkerson shrieked, “My God! They have missed!” Twenty-seven minutes later, Wilkerson died. How did he dispatch his own victim? Ironically, by the very same method–gunfire–that eventually did him in. There is no account of how long it took Wilkerson’s victim to die after being shot by Wilkerson, or what his victim’s last words may have been.
Willie Francis was electrocuted in 1946 in Louisiana for gunning down his employer, but Francis failed to die in the chair because of negligence on the part of the drunken prison guard who prepared it. He was re-electrocuted in 1947 after his unsuccessful appeal to SCOTUS.
The last example trotted out by King is that of William Kemmler, who was electrocuted in 1890 in a fiery mishap. While Kemmler’s death was no doubt gruesome, it could not have been as disturbing as his common-law wife and victim’s demise, who he murdered with a hatchet on March 29, 1889.
Forgive me if I am not moved by the discomfort experienced by any of these murderes in meeting their maker. And thankfully, neither is SCOTUS.
Thx to the NY Times and How Appealing
April 22, 2008
April 22, 2008
Patent law is usually not very fertile fodder for humor, but behold the exception. And it’s only 127 years old.
As Professor Post recounts over at Volokh, the case of Egbert v. Lippmann, 104 U.S. 333 (1881) involved the attempted patent of a corset spring. The patent was disallowed by the Court under the “public use” doctrine because the inventor/applicant had given one of the springs to his then-girlfriend and future wife.
The dissent dryly observed that, if a corset spring used by one woman out of public view constitutes “public use,” it would be hard to fathom what could not be. Id. at 339. In perhaps the first documented use of a double entendre by SCOTUS, the majority held:
The inventor slept on his rights for eleven years.
Id. at 337.
Thx to Volokh
April 21, 2008
If you’d just spent $17.2 billion on something, wouldn’t you need a drink too?
Well, Reuters–which recently parted with just such a sum in its acquisition of Thomson West (aka Westlaw)–is hosting one of many pre-parties for this week’s White House Correspondents’ Association dinner. Some of the drink specials that will be available at the bar include:
Hillary’s Bosnian Bull-shooter
If you’re hoping to get intoxicated from this drink, run for cover. A single shot will keep you honest.
Distilled water imported from Tuzla.
Barack O’Bomber
More popular than ever with the younger set, the O’Bomber is sure to bowl you over. For a truly religious experience, polish it off and order another. You’ll be singing its praises – and Wrightfully so.
Vodka, Jagermeister, Red Bull energy drink with a lime wedge.
The Senior Moment
This one packs such a punch that you’ll have trouble distinguishing one extremist group from another.
Scotch on the rocks, no twist.
Thx to Shenanigans
April 21, 2008
The N.Y. Post opened its story this weekend about the arrest of a CNN reporter after hours in Central Park this way:
CNN personality Richard Quest was busted in Central Park early yesterday with some drugs in his pocket, a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot.
Wow. Hard not to want to read on after that opening salvo.
The story concluded with this paragraph recounting why Quest turned down an offer once upon a time to work for the friendly folks at Al Jazeera:
He was reportedly once offered a position for the English-language version of the controversial Al Jazeera network, but said he turned it down because being gay and Jewish, he didn’t think it would be a good fit.
Yeah, I’ve heard that about Al Jazeera; they’re not the most inclusive bunch of newshounds out there. Good call.
Thx to the N.Y. Post
April 17, 2008
If you see a naked woman in the reflected image in Vice President Cheney’s sunglasses, you are: (1) an idiot; and (2) not an angler.
Apparently, a lot of people thought the Veep was cavorting with a scantily clad lady instead of casting his fly rod.
* * * UPDATE * * *
At last night’s 64th Annual Radio and Television Correspondents Dinner, Vice President Cheney began his speech by donning his now-famous hat and sunglasses, and quipped:
You’d be amazed how at how many guys want to go fishing with me these days.
* * *
The most common question [I get asked] is what lure was I using?
* * *
That’s the last time I go fishing with an outfitter called the “Emperor’s Club VIP.”
He also got in a subtle shot at Senator Obama, observing that the crowd at the dinner were not ones to look down on a “bitter man who clings to his guns.”
Thx to Newsbusters, McClatchey, and CSPAN
April 16, 2008
This is the second in our long-running if ill-advised and rarely-updated series of random, funny pictures:
“David Broder Is Never Too Old To Pick Up Chicks Outside The Local Library”
Or so says Fishbowl D.C. What David Broder was actually doing outside this library was interviewing Pennsylvania voters regarding the upcoming Presidential primary.
Thx to FishBowl D.C.
